Perspective on Failure Part 2 - Why We Crash and Burn

    My last blog post was a brief perspective on failure from Dave Harvey's book, Rescuing Ambition. I've been reflecting on this recently because of a recent instance of failure in my life. A paper that I thought would surely be accepted for presentation in a conference was soundly rejected. Now, it's not a moral failure (thank God!) and it's really a minor setback. I've had bigger screw-ups! But I admit that it bruised my ego. Prior to this, I've had a 100% acceptance rate in all the technical papers and abstracts that I've submitted. I've presented in past conferences and even won a "Best Presentor" award at one point. This was my first rejection and it was humbling. My co-authors, who are colleagues at work, also received the notice of rejection so it was an awkward moment for all of us and especially for me because I was the lead author.

    So in times like this, we go to Scripture. How does God use our failure for His glory? Do failures really have a place in his plan? How does Jesus' sacrifice and victory on the cross rescue us from our failures?

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Perspective on Failure

Pastor Dave Harvey's perspective on failure :

"...if God is truly sovereign, there must be a place for our failure in his plan. From Genesis to Revelation, the Bible declares God's supreme control over events. If he can't work through our screwups, he's guilty of false advertising."

"Failure isn't simply God's nightstick to whack us into submission. It's an experience where we can discover God's love, his irresistible grace, and the true potency of the gospel. But to get to those discoveries, we must see failure as the place where some ambitions go to die so other things might come alive."

-Quoted from the book Rescuing Ambition

The Parable of the Rubber Band

Dave Kraft, author of Leaders Who Last, tells this story:

"We don't have the same gifts, personality, or capacity. I think people are like rubber bands, which come in all sizes and shapes. Some are small and some are large. A small rubber band can only be stretched so far. It has limits. A rubber band that is larger can obviously be stretched further. Regardless of how big or small the rubber band, it can only be stretched for so long, and then it needs to go back to a resting position. If it is stretched too far and stays there too long, it will snap."

The point of the illustration is that we all have limited capacities. We cannot remain in a  prolonged, stretched situation. We need to rest. There is always something that needs to be done. However, living a life of constant busyness with no rest brings about serious problems.

    Rest is simply an emotional or physical pause. Dave Kraft describes the importance of rest this way, "If priorities protect my purpose and passion, then pacing prolongs it." It is often overlooked that God established a day of rest, called the Sabbath (Genesis 2:2-3), and that He commanded the people of Israel to observe it (Exodus 20:8-11). God appointed it for the common benefit of all mankind. According to Jesus, God made the Sabbath for men (Mark 2:27). That it is included in the 10 commandments surely means that modern day Christians ought to still keep it and obey it. Rest is a blessing from God, an outpouring of God's common grace to an undeserving people.

    We all know the benefits of taking time off 1 day a week yet we don't keep it. Like the rubber band, our bodily frame was not made to stand up to incessant work without regular intervals of rest. It needs time to recuperate and heal so it can do productive work once again.  In the same way, our mind and our soul needs as much rest as our bodies.

    Pastor JC Ryle gives this warning for Christians,

"It is in the midst of a hurrying, bustling world, in which its interests are constantly in danger of being jostled out of sight. To have those interests properly attended to, there must be a special day set apart; there must be a regularly recurring time for examining the state of our souls; there must be a day to test and prove us, whether we are prepared for an eternal heaven. Take away a man's Sabbath, and his religion soon comes to nothing."

A lack of pacing in our lives leads to an empty faith. "No Sabbath" soon leads to "no God". That's a sobering thought.

    So take time off. Pace yourself. It is good for you. Don't live life running on fumes. Enjoy this often overlooked blessing from God. But remember to keep it holy. Sabbath was made for you to drop your work for a day and spend that time recuperating your mind, body and soul with God.

Motives



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     JI Packer once said,

"We need to remember that in God's sight, motivation is an integral element of action, and any motivation that exalts self will render our work rotten to the core."

    If there is one thing in our life that must be examined daily, it would be our motives.  All works of righteousness such as giving money to the poor, preaching or teaching the Word, praying, even following Jesus and going to church can be done for the wrong reasons. Our actions may create a perception that we are holy and righteous yet what is seen on the outside is inconsistent with what's happening inside the heart. In short, motives reveal our true character and the true state of our heart. The Bible is replete with examples of this and we shall see that all wrong motives come from a heart that ultimately seeks only self-exaltation.

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How To Start The Day Right






Each morning that greets me is full of hope...

    Not because I am successful at what I am doing
   
    Or because people near me appreciate me,

    Or because circumstances are easy

    But because God is, and He is my Father.

To look at the morning any other way...

    Is to believe a lie

    To live in hope is to live in truth

    To live in truth is to bring Him glory

    To bring God glory in my daily living

    Is the highest form of worship.


-Excerpt from the book How People Change by Timothy S. Lane and Paul Tripp.

When Parents Fear The Lord, Their Children Benefit

Who is the man who fears the LORD? Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose. His soul shall abide in well-being, and his offspring shall inherit the land.

  - Psalm 25:12-13 (ESV)

    A man that fears God has a teachable heart. He is the man that is 100% committed to walk in the of the Lord. This is the man whose decisions and actions are not guided by his own wisdom and understanding but instead relies on God's Word. His heart is fully surrendered to the control of the Holy Spirit. God will guide him into a good life for himself and his children. Note the condition by which this result comes: fear the Lord.

    To fear the Lord is NOT to be filled with terror, despair, and dread before him. This kind of fear drives us away from God. Godly fear is best described as "reverence". It is the convergence of awe, adoration, veneration, wonder, honor, worship, confidence, and thankfulness that arises from recognizing God for who he is. It is an acknowledgment of his transcendent qualities, his absolute authority, and his supreme value. This kind of fear draws us near to God.

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Dazzle Your Kids With Grace!

    Most parenting styles lie between two extremes. At one end is unstructured permissiveness. The other end is oppressive control. A permissive parent prefers to love and nurture but “spares the rod” and kids that are raised in this environment can be out of control, self-centered, and spoiled. An oppressive parent is harsh, abusive, and tyrannical that his children are discouraged, humiliated, provoked to anger, and living in constant fear. Both of these extremes are sinful and damaging to the lives of children (Proverbs 13:24, Colossians 3:21, Ephesians 6:4).


    Christian parents like me, being aware of this, are careful to maintain a balance of love and discipline. However, what passes as “Christian parenting” nowadays is really a syncretism of biblical principles with modern psychology. By and large, they are tips and principles on how to do our job right as parents so that our kids will become "good, law-abiding Christians" that are successful at whatever they do. This approach is limiting, perhaps dangerous, and can be just as damaging to children because they can become religiously obedient but still have spiritually unregenerate hearts. Kids raised this way will find no need of the gospel message, relying instead on self-righteousness and self-effort in living as Christians. And they won’t endure, with most leaving church and abandoning their faith by the time they grow into adulthood. This is all because the gospel message was obscured as they were growing up in a Christian environment.

    That is why I welcome the recent emergence of Christian literature on gospel-powered, gospel-centered parenting. Give Them Grace by authors Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson stands out by going against the syncretic paradigm found in many Christian parenting books. They show how the gospel radically changes all aspects of our parenting style because it shifts our parenting efforts away from changing our child’s behavior and towards the heart of the matter: the transformation of our child’s heart. We parents, have passed on to our children our idol-making, self-centered hearts and Jesus said that parents cannot will their kids to become Christians (John 1:12-13). Only God, by His grace, can transform their rebellious hearts through faith in Jesus Christ, and then they will obey and walk in the law of the Lord.

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